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Sunday, June 21, 2009

Crossroads

I am at one. Standing there looking at all the directions I could go and feeling a bit paralyzed. It's one of those situations where you can't stay where you are but you also don't want to go - but since you can't stay - you have to go and there I am. Standing in the middle of intersecting choices and paths laid out before me with all the ambiguity and mystery the future has to offer up.  The longer I stand here the more my legs ache to run, the more my mind wants to pick the right direction. If only I knew what that was.

Instead I stand in the center of the intersection, looking and turning and peering down each road. Sometimes I hope a car will come along and hit me so I am spared the decision altogether.  But that would just be too easy and I have learned from long experience that life is rarely easy or fair. 

I am gonna wait awhile longer, as excruciating as that is. Take some deep breaths and wait for that gut deep certainty about what to do.